This is wat I hear whenever I catch up with something bad which i cannot change. People tell me to just move on as it is part of life. I couldn’t at most of the time.. that when everyone call me and my thoughts as old. Sometimes it is, but how do we tell something is new and old.. just by the time it has lived.. and when someone is dead.. we mourn .. if we keep mourning people tell us the same “move on” and  our thoughts which we have for the dead person need to be fixed. hmm… whatever people try to tell.. something just stays with us forever.. like the habit of biting nails.. or reading a book while eating..

May be everyone doesn’t be sad or look sad.. or they keep things to their heart always. We are forced to celebrate festivals.. though my intention is just to think about the people who cared and not with me today. Not sure whether the force festive mood works well. For some people it does.. people who relish festivities more than anything else..!

Writing or thinking abt something/someone who is gone doesnt bring them back.. at the least we can get the thoughts running into those humorous moments shared.. teh most exciting thing I always feel about human mind is the ability to imagine and bring back moment in real HD quality.. hope still we have time for those who had time for us …

First new year without the most important person in my life. The one without whom I would have never learnt anything..! Life doesn’t always move on.. Many times we just don’t look in rear view mirror.. we get out of the car and look back.. even if it is for a moment.. it helps us through the rest of the journey.. not sure everyone will understand this.. only people who are through the tougher road will get the idea quick and clear..

          We had some time killing presentation about the companies policy and other stuff.. finally they started to tell us we are Criminals (who dont excel in work) .. the smart interpreter in front of us started to tell that whatever we were doing .. slogging to accomplish is only a drop in the expected ocean. Its also told to us that even if we work 48/14 we cannot even come close to their expectation, no idea why they wanted to tell us that fact in first place.. no idea…. :O .

           Finally this year there was no increase in the pay cheque and there is always increase in no of emails with loads of work.. always makes me to re-think as I never wanted this kind of de-motivating job.. when I look around everyone seemed to be happy about their work, no complains everyone sometimes even felt they dono much and they are paid ok to lead their life. Its kind of interesting that I had aim to get into such job when i was n school/college.. life is wierd and aims are not always fulfilling… and no idea why no one wants to change the path when they are half way around and most of it meets an end where we keep a shop and settle down without even knowing we know to walk ahead..

           Why do we need to talk, give opinions.. when our words are barely counted.. better save energy to sing our fav song later

Director or editor someone is really out of mind.. oops i forgot about the story writer.. OMG.. I think they should see the movie once without any interruption before releasing it in public.. I thot it to be something else finally saw it a simple fancy tour for 3 and odd hrs.. Hope Vikram gets a better story and editing for his next movie I liked the songs though.. they can try someother villian.. Ashish oh always its him these days..!

This guy is pathetic.. not becas he s trustfully illiterate about his work.. but he thinks otherwise

So he has this simple temperament of pleasing his boss by watever stupid/idiotic work he can do. And thats the funny part we always look out for. He called me up today to chk up some stupid stuff which is not so important as I will be joining work tomoro after a brief sick instinct.

Not sure why we have this intelligent gadget called mobile phones. This guy called up my dad and asked my current landline number and called me up and asked the crappy unimportant questions. It was weird as i was not aware that he made a call to my dad. So when I knew this later today i was totally out of my mind and logged into my webmail to check wat so important he needed. Its crappier than his call.

Such people in my office make me re-think about going to work everyday! It isn’t their fault that I still have some sense to understand his non-sense. Hope I get a no nonsense job…. and it always stays as a dream as it does always…!

It was a normal day.. finally it ended to be a very terrible one. I don’t need any reminders to remember what effect this day this year has caused in my life. One great mind, closest to my heart passed away, and I couldn’t do anything, except treasure the memories.

Death makes us feel how little and helpless we are. We are nothing but just idle watchers. This really makes me pathetic when the closest people move away and its really hard to face the absence as reality and proceed with the life as if nothing has happened. If you are grief stricken people call you sentimental.. if that goes more than the expected time we are named mental.. so hardly I talk about what makes me feel sad, as people really don’t care the impact its having on me. Everyone want me to be practical or watever you name it to forget dead people.. So I stopped talking about it to people who ask me to forget.

No one can understand, no one can even come close to understanding. It is not the same grief to everyone and it holds the same to joy.

Hope not to talk about the people to other people.. which is the cause of everything.. better to keep it within the mind.. which is like un failing gmail having all the conversations in order with lot of memory

People always feel happy to talk whatever they want .. hardly few think about the implications that it causes in other person’s emotional outcome. Age, sex, money.. nothing matters.. I see people with foul mouths daily.. and even though I try to think that its only my perception .. and  try to put myself to their shoes.. I still see that I wont talk that way if I am in any such situation..

Finally I come to see really ill faced smart people.. who are looked up as big guys/gals.. some people ofcourse like them.. dono whether their behavior is bad only to me… or they are trying to teach me a lesson.. God Knows.. Me dono.

And it really hurts when people talk bad about the people you love and they tell you its just for fun. It doesn’t hurt only at the time they talk.. it hurts whenever I think about them. Its weird that I have to face such people so often in my good and bad times. It doesn’t take a split second to contaminate my mind and mouth like theirs to teach them a lesson, still feel that I couldn’t do it. I feel better I didn’t do the same way, I feel really good thinking Am far better than the filthy mind such people have. Hope I stay the same way. Gud that I am occupied with work, rather than dealing with such people. Kind of blessing in disguise stuff..

Its interesting and such things happen only in so called game of cricket

I met this shutdown guy, who is kool and funny, and intelligent, yet faces failures throughout his life and most of it is circumstantial, I just couldn’t resist, but to ask him

“Hey, how can u ever move on with such things happening?”

he was al in his smiles and told me

“I always wanted to end my life, but whenever I tried to put it into action, I got motivated to live by simple things like kid walking past me smiling, or the older guy giving me swami prasad or my frends making my day more beautiful.. I just think one sec that is dying worth sacrificing all these beautiful things? and my answer was always a No”

I just couldnt react, was looking wierd at him..

he continued.. “I know why you are asking this, you desperately want to see me successful, but you couldn’t do anything about it, but you still want to be for me, and make me understand that, and I know that long before .. and I don’t want to dissapoint friends like you”

Ya, shutdown guy, he always reboots ..

At times we too need to reboot, and get things back to normal. Rebooting kills unwanted processes that we have started long back and has only default stuff goin on, sameway we might also want to end up unwanted stuff like our ego, complex etc which would be taking too much of our memory, becas all these weren’t our default functionality, and we are better off without them

Its so weird to see ppl around me al through the day, opice, shops, n my apartment, that they think that even the highest learned/powered guy dono much and all that he has is only luck and only these ppl are the intelligent lot that God has gifted earth with.

Its so funny to see that they talk crap about the so called their specialization and it gets extremely funny when they think I am dumb